goodbye gracey!
She won my heart. Forty pounds, tan coat, white tummy, big brown eyes. Floppy ears. For someone who recoils at the sight of dog drool and cringes at the thought of tongue contact, I even surprised myself. We sat on the ground in front of her kennel at the Hillsborough County Animal Rescue Center, petting her from the other side of her barred cage.
On the flip side, thoughts brood in my heart: How will I care for a dog when most days, I feel as if I'm struggling to care for my three kids? What will we do with her when we move? What if she has a past history that we can't foresee?
Worry has a strange way of entering into our hearts. I like to say that I am thinking realistically, trying to explore all of the angles or being careful. I am learning that there is a fine line between being wise and discerning about making a decision and worrying. To worry is to strain to see beyond what I am meant to see. To worry is to want control over things which are far out of my reach. To worry is the opposite of knowing I am loved, fully cared for and provided for by the only One who sees everything, knows everything and is fully in control. Worry is fear. And fear cannot exist with love.
As of now, Gracey is not ours. She may never be ours. We visited her again today, fully knowing that her owners have contacted the shelter and would be on their way to claim her tonight.
We are disappointed. Even I, who have struggled and worried over the very decision to go and look for a family dog, felt that deflated, sad feeling when I had to say goodbye to her. Her nose was pressed against the bars, tail wagging, tongue licking anything we pushed up to her, whether is was a hand or a nose.
I am not in control. The dog I worried about being able to keep is not unavailable to us after all and I feel sad. The reality? God loves our family and knows the best dog for us. Gracey will be reunited with a family that has probably been in anguish over her absence.
As for me, I see now that I have a place in my heart for a dog. If I could warm up to Gracey, there just may be another little canine that will win our family's heart.
If we find her, I will choose to live in the moment that I am given, knowing that I don't have to see around the corner. I will care for this one with the belief that we are called to be stewards of all of God's beautiful creation. And I will trust that the responsibilities of being of a pet owner will be far outweighed by the blessings of a new companion, playmate and friend.
soli deo gloria!
#50 big brown eyes, floppy ears, sweet dog
#51 watching lydia stop at each kennel to let the dogs lick her hand
#53 flip videos of baby olivia cooing and swatting at toys
#54 laughing with sweet friends over a bowl of pasta
#55 planting new seeds with kids
#56 our history, our legacy, our freedoms
#57 comforting another with the comfort I have received
#58 the courage of those who stand in faith
#59 God's quiet leading
On the flip side, thoughts brood in my heart: How will I care for a dog when most days, I feel as if I'm struggling to care for my three kids? What will we do with her when we move? What if she has a past history that we can't foresee?
Worry has a strange way of entering into our hearts. I like to say that I am thinking realistically, trying to explore all of the angles or being careful. I am learning that there is a fine line between being wise and discerning about making a decision and worrying. To worry is to strain to see beyond what I am meant to see. To worry is to want control over things which are far out of my reach. To worry is the opposite of knowing I am loved, fully cared for and provided for by the only One who sees everything, knows everything and is fully in control. Worry is fear. And fear cannot exist with love.
As of now, Gracey is not ours. She may never be ours. We visited her again today, fully knowing that her owners have contacted the shelter and would be on their way to claim her tonight.
We are disappointed. Even I, who have struggled and worried over the very decision to go and look for a family dog, felt that deflated, sad feeling when I had to say goodbye to her. Her nose was pressed against the bars, tail wagging, tongue licking anything we pushed up to her, whether is was a hand or a nose.
I am not in control. The dog I worried about being able to keep is not unavailable to us after all and I feel sad. The reality? God loves our family and knows the best dog for us. Gracey will be reunited with a family that has probably been in anguish over her absence.
As for me, I see now that I have a place in my heart for a dog. If I could warm up to Gracey, there just may be another little canine that will win our family's heart.
If we find her, I will choose to live in the moment that I am given, knowing that I don't have to see around the corner. I will care for this one with the belief that we are called to be stewards of all of God's beautiful creation. And I will trust that the responsibilities of being of a pet owner will be far outweighed by the blessings of a new companion, playmate and friend.
soli deo gloria!
#50 big brown eyes, floppy ears, sweet dog
#51 watching lydia stop at each kennel to let the dogs lick her hand
#53 flip videos of baby olivia cooing and swatting at toys
#54 laughing with sweet friends over a bowl of pasta
#55 planting new seeds with kids
#56 our history, our legacy, our freedoms
#57 comforting another with the comfort I have received
#58 the courage of those who stand in faith
#59 God's quiet leading
love it. you are great! Talk to you soon!!
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